I am currently standing on the most unclear, ambiguous, indecisive period of my life (so far).

I’ve always been hopping from school to school, university to company, without this long “unemployed” period between. Ha, but I guess this was something I asked for. When I can stay free and think about what I really wanna do in my life. So I should be grateful for this chance, actually *sigh*

Somehow I know what I really want. And I guess Universe has sent strong signal to me that I’m gonna succeed at this. It’s just, probably, I’m not prepared yet to do any significant sacrifice to take this decision firmly. I’m just not ready for the opportunity cost I have to spend. I’m just too greedy to choose one—and keep wanting for all instead.

Sometimes I just wanna scream loudly to myself: where did your brave soul go? Where did your unbreakable spirit disappear? Since when you become so cautious, so fragile and so worry?

Probably because I’m about to be twenty-five and this whole quarter-life crisis kinda hold me up.

On previous weekend I went to Glasgow for attending Palapa Project, an exhibition of Indonesian creative products. My team wasn’t actually selected as finalists, but I’m so proud of all the exhibited products. All of them were created by students in cooperation with local SMEs, with simple-yet-stunning design…and they deserve a spotlight!

I didn’t participate in the exhibition…but I sold some handmade crafts of Pelangi Nusantara 🙂 It wasn’t huge sales, but it made me happy when the non-Indonesian people turned their head on our products and praise them genuinely. Especially that I knew personally the women’s hands that created these stuffs…And when I told them about this they become very happy too, so it’s double happiness! 😉

After that I updated my shop on Etsy. But yeah…selling online needs continuous marketing and SEO effort too before it pays you. I didn’t put quite much effort on marketing my Etsy shop; my mind was pulled by another petty problem—like how I’m gonna survive living in UK for the next 3 months.

So I guess, I have to take firm decision on this. Because no decision is made over no sacrifice. And as Dumbledore said, it has to be done for the greater good…and perhaps, for a bigger dream.